❝ thanks to those that came before us i’m spread too thin ;
please give me some time. ♡
❝ stop going on about ‘effort’ and more ‘effort ;
as of recently, it has been decided that baepsae will rarely ever take requests for reviews or brand sponsorship unless the product or brand is something that is truly loved by the blogger and would reflect the attitude and personality of the blog. that said, in the off-chance that there is a case where baepsae does accept a product for review or a sponsorship, this tidbit is created to, as the title insinuates, allows for clear and open transparency. there may, on occasion, be an affiliate link or links in a post or a review for a product sent for the blog; however, these things will be disclosed immediately and multiple times within the post or somewhere on the blog. any content curated for and including aformentioned links and brands are not influenced by any one, thing, or entity outside of the blog’s owner. opinions, views, and how they are stated are that of the blog and the blogger’s and has no baring on the company or product unless stated otherwise. opinions and views are completely subjective, should not be taken as gospel, or used as the only source of “credible” information even if there are tinges of objective information provided. this blog nor its sponsors are liable for how you, the reader, absorb, handle, and accept the information provied to you nor are they liable if something were to happen in the event that you decide to follow the words and opinions found here. not everything works for everyone and, while recommendations are given, it is not anyone’s place to be a keeper of any sort for any person. currently, this section is a bit of a work in progress but if there are questions, comments, or concerns, feel free to send an email and you’ll get a response almost immediately.
❝ they all say their legs are worth a million bucks ;
please give me some time. ♡
❝ let’s all just get along well together ;
please give me some time. ♡
❝ licensing & credits ;
currently, this blog is protected under a creative commons attribution-noncommercial-sharealike 4.0 international (cc by-nc-sa 4.0) license. this means that the content found here is available for sharing, adapting, building upon, transforming, and remixing; however, with certain guidelines that have to be followed. appropriate credit must be given at all times, even if the content has been adapted, built upon, transformed, or remixed. credit given must not be given in a way that assumes that mchiblogs* and its owner endorses you, the borrower, or your opinions. the content found here is not for commerical usage outside of this blog and/or without proper permission given. basically, no making money off the work found here. finally, if the content here is remixed, transformed, or built upon, they have to be shared under the same license and noted as such. for more information on this license, go here.
baepsae
h e l l o ! welcome to baepsae. baepsae is, admittedly, a blog that was accidentally named after a k-pop song and the rebrand of a dying thing that doesn’t deserve to die. there is no niche, no focus to this blog. it just kinda is a thing. — read more...
this blog is protected under a creative commons attribution-noncommercial-sharealike 4.0 international (cc by-nc-sa 4.0) license. read more...
Where Have You Been?
Wednesday, November 15, 2017
hello, everyone.

it’s been quite some time since we last spoke. almost three months exactly. i feel like i should have something more interesting and intriguing to say or offer up for why i poofed for three months but i don’t. to be fair, i always feel this way and never have anything much to say. if you read my last post before it got drafted and hidden, then you’re well aware of the fact that i have been over the blogging community as an idea and blogging as a thing for quite some time before my disappearance. in that post, i alluded to the fact that i found the blogging world to be clique-y, overly judgemental, and just, overall, an unenjoyable place to be in especially for someone who, at that time, was rather close to just up and attempting suicide or becoming a ghost once again.

admittedly, i do still feel that way but distancing myself from people and this world for so long actually made a significant difference. that combined with the fact that i’m seeing the fruits of my labour and planning slowly coming to fruition and having cut out toxicity out of my life completely has made me reach a level of contentment that i had been battling to reach for a long time. i’ve mentioned this a couple times—all in posts that are now drafted, archived, or deleted—that two years ago, i had a public falling out with someone that i considered, at that point, a friend. two years have gone by since that point and it took me a lot of thinking, alcohol, and thinking while drinking and drunk off said alcohol to realise that one of the things that were holding me back from being content again was the fact that i had spent so much time lying to myself about how i felt for that person. i wanted a reason to be upset and i wanted a reason to care about how that entire thing played out and in reality, i genuinely did not care about that person or the people that decided to continue to associate with that person.

and honestly, it wasn’t just with that person and those associated with them that i came to this conclusion about. even down to the person i had been in love with for years, i just realised that, at the end of the day, i was only unhappy because i clung to the feelings i had for them. maybe i should have said more to defend myself when that public incident happened. maybe i should have been open and directly stated my feelings. i felt like those were things i should have felt and so i kept those in my mind so that i was perpetually circling down a spiral that i wouldn’t have cared about if i wasn’t trying to fit into something that i didn’t fit.

don’t get me wrong, i’m still lowkey petty about the person who tried to publicly shame me when let’s be real here, i could have easily been trash and returned the favour tenfold; however, i know that i don’t care enough about them to be that way. do i wish them the best? not in the slightest. but i also don’t wish them unhappiness. they are simply there and they exist. and that’s honestly how i feel about all the people i referred to earlier. i just don’t care.

and the reason i bring this up is because i’m so much more content because of that realisation. that because i am able to come to terms with that lack of care rather than just saying it, i’m able to finally rid myself of those particular issues.

a huge reason i’ve written all of this is to give a reason or a part of the reason i decided to take a break and the things i’ve learned, overcome, and walked away from because i took such a break.

now that i’m back, i don’t think i can be the same blogger that i was before. i’m not able to do the same things i did before without feeling a bit weird about it; without feeling like i’m going through the motions. so i changed my domain & blog name and decided to start anew.
a part of me deciding to come back to blogging, aside of needing a place to store my thoughts and ramblings, was that i needed to purge everything that could be potentially toxic or associated to some toxicity or toxic point in my life. this meant that my blog name and the posts needed to be removed as did all of my older blogs and posts from previous iterations of blogging.

and despite always saying that i would never delete old blogs and posts, i’ve realised that for the last five or so years, i’ve been in such a dark, toxic place that deleting was the best option. it was lovely to have those reminders and before i wrote this post and before i switched over to this new name and new blog, i read those old posts. i read every single post i’ve made since december of 2010 and it was lovely. i saw myself grow and thrive, then crash and crumble to dust, and then i purged it all. i don’t regret those blogs or reiterations of myself, i don’t regret the people i’ve encountered and let go or said goodbye to or anything like that. i just grew from those things and thoughts.

anyway, how have you lot been? catch me up on your lives in the comments below. i missed the little interactions i got to have with you lot.

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